I hope I'm getting extra credit for this.
A person in Texas asked me to write down what I know about the Greek gods, and I was like, "Can we do this anonomously? Because I don't need the Olympians mad at me again."
But if it helps you to know your Greek gods, and survive an encounter with them if they ever show up in your face, then I guess writing all this down will be my good deed for the week.
If you don't know me, my name is Spaghettitiger. I'm a modern-day demigod --- A half-god, half-mortal daughter of *CLASSIFIED* --- but I'm not going to say much about myself. My story has already been posted online in comics that are totally fiction (wink, wink) and I am just a character from the story (cough --- Yeah, right! --- cough).
Just go easy on me while I'm telling you about the gods, all right? There's like forty bajillion different versions of the myths, so don't be all Well, I heard it a different way, so you're WRONG!
I'm going to tell you the versions that make the most sense to me. I promise I didn't make any of this up. I got these straight from the Aincent Greek and Roman dudes who wrote them down in the first place. Believe me, I couldn't make up stuff this weird.
So here we go. First I'll tell you how the world got made. Then I'll run down the list of gods and give my two cents about them. I just hope I don't make them so mad they'll incinerate me before I-
Just kidding. Still here.
Anyway, I'll start with the Greek story of creation, which by the way, is seriously messed up. Wear your safety glasses and raincoat. There will be blood.